I Corinthians 7:7 For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that.
8 I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I.
9 But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.
10 And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband:
11 But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.
12 But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away.
Marriage is God’s design. He instituted marriage in the first place. Man has distorted marriage and manipulated it for his own selfish goals. Today we have church weddings and barn weddings and outdoor weddings and justice of the peace weddings, etc. We have lost sight of what a wedding should be and what the purpose of marriage is.
I have spoken with people who are fornicators who claim they cannot get married because they cannot afford it. They have in their minds that they must have certain things at their wedding and unless they can have that they will defy God further by living in fornication. They do not realize they are already under God’s condemnation and all their sins are recorded in God’s book. They will all be exposed to them at the great white throne judgment.
The apostle Paul was directed by God to speak to the saints in Corinth about the evil they were allowing to flourish in their midst as a local church. In chapter 7 the issue is with regard to male/female issues and how Biblical intimacy is to be expressed.
In verse 7 Paul spoke of his preference. The naysayers will again take this as non-authoritative. They dismiss it because Paul spoke in the first person. They conclude that this is just his opinion. If we go back to the opening verses of this epistle we are reminded there that Paul was an apostle of Jesus Christ and that he was writing under the authority of God. He was not sitting down with pen and paper and writing some story because he had extra time on his hands. II Timothy 3:16 declares:
II Timothy 3:16 All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:
For those who use the perversions, this verse will mean nothing. They do not have the sure Word of God and they do not believe anyone has the sure Word of God. They are living in a delusional world that has no God that is higher than themselves.
In verse 7 of our text, Paul stated further that every man has his proper gift of God. God gives every person a conscience. Every person is given the same ability to know right from wrong. God also has a purpose for every person. No person is born a sodomite. Some boys and some girls will grow up and not desire to be married. They will be content to function as a single person. They do not need to sneak off and find some pornography on the net, or in a magazine somewhere. They will be content to live as single individuals. Some of those people will be saved and some will not be saved. The saved ones will find fulfillment in serving the Lord in their singleness. They will choose to glorify God in the way He designed them. Those who are saved and get married will do the same. Paul will go on and explain how that works.
In verse 8 Paul gave further teaching for those who were unmarried or widowed. He stated that is was good for them to be as he was. Paul was directed to write those words by God.
In verse 9 Paul further stated that a person that cannot be content to be single needs to get married. It is a sin for a woman to lust after a man or a man to lust after a woman. God does not lead anyone to lust after another person. He designs most to get married, but not through lust. The God-fearing person will pray about this matter as with all matters. The person that believes they should get married needs to be directed to who their spouse should be.
I remember as a young man desiring to be married, but not knowing how to go about finding a wife. I followed the norms of the time and dated several young women. It was not until after I was married that my spiritual eyes were opened to the truth that has always been there. I am thankful that in spite of my ignorance, He led me to a good woman. We have been married now for over 50 years. God has been good to us.
God says it is better to marry than to burn. God does not want us to live unfulfilled lives. The Catholics demand that their ‘priests and nuns’ not marry. Many of them are burning. There are many illegitimate children that have come from that burning. There are also many boys who have been abused by ‘burning priests’. The Catholic religion is corrupt.
In verse 10 Paul reminded the readers that God was commanding him and he was passing that command on to others as God directed him. In this verse he began to deal with God’s design for permanence of marriage. Paul was not writing anything new here. God laid the foundation of marriage in Genesis 2:24
Genesis 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
Jesus referred back to that passage in refuting the lies of the Pharisees in Matthew 19. The wife is not to depart from her husband. That is God’s design. In verse 11, Paul stated that if the woman does leave, then she is to remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. If a husband becomes abusive, then the wife may need to leave for a time until that sin is dealt with.
This is again why the local church is so important. If a husband and wife cannot discuss their differences in a godly manner, they will need outside help. That outside help should come from a good church. The secular world does not even know what a true marriage looks like. They say 2 men or 2 women can “marry”. They say that fornication is a good thing. They have no business in counselling anyone.
In verse 11 Paul further stated that the husband was not to put away his wife. This is very clear. The many “Christians” who reject this prove their true relationship with God. The heresy of “the God of the second chance” is just that. It is a heresy. God does not want people to be shocked after death. He wants people to know the facts now and He gives the facts very clearly and very plainly. People need to be careful not to follow liars such as the Pharisees were. Jesus corrected their lies on this matter in Matthew 19:
Matthew 19:8 He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.
Once again we see that the problem is not a lack of information. It is a rejection of the truth that is involved. Godly pastors need to teach what God says. There is no room for bleeding hearts here. We cannot allow our emotions to get in the way. Divorce and remarriage is hitting so many families now. A godly pastor cannot allow rebellious children to get in the way of obeying God.
Eli allowed his children to get in the way of God’s will. He paid dearly for that sin. Samuel’s sons did not follow him either, but God did not accuse him of sheltering his boys.
In verse 12 Paul continued to give God’s Word on this matter. He is not suggesting what he wrote here is not inspired of God. He is simply stating, under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, that what he is saying here has not been stated previously by the Lord. It was clearly implied before, but God directed Paul to write further details on this. God knows that we as people are fond of “loop holes”. We like to claim there are grey areas. Most professing Christians claim there are grey areas when it comes to divorce and remarriage. The fact is that there are no grey areas, there are just unlearned or oftentimes defiant people who want their own way.
I have been asked several times to officiate for divorced people who want to marry someone else. I am thankful that God has shown me long ago that this is wrong. I have explained God’s Word on this matter in each case. Some of those I have spoken to have insisted that they would find someone else to act on their behalf. I have told them they have the liberty to do that, but that they were going against the will of God. Others have listened and have not followed through on their original plan. Some had never bothered to pay attention to what God says on this matter and when shown the truth, they have submitted to the truth.
God is good and He works in the heart of all people. A few will submit to His will, and many will not. In verse 12 Paul stated that a brother who had an unbelieving wife, should not put her away if she is content to dwell with him. Either the couple was unsaved when they were married and then the husband got saved, but the wife did not, or the husband was disobedient and was carnal and married an unsaved woman. Paul addressed that matter in II Corinthians 6. Even if the man was saved and disobeyed God and married an ungodly woman, that was no grounds for divorce.
There are people who like to use that argument. They claim they were wrong in their choice for marriage, but now they know better and sooo… Again, they are looking for a “loop hole”. God does not offer loop holes. He declares the truth.
In verse 12, the saved husband would not be catering to his unsaved wife. He is not going to skip church and go to the mall or go fishing, etc. just to appease his ungodly wife. He is going to honour God and put Him first and if the wife will respect that and follow his leadership, then he has no reason nor authority to put her away.
God is not finished with this matter here yet. We will see further what God says on this matter. God never offers suggestions. He makes decrees. He gives commands. He gives sound doctrine. To those who are reading this, but divorced and remarried, you have no Biblical grounds for your adulterous relationship. To those who are struggling in your marriage, if you are saved, humble yourselves and repent toward God and seek His forgiveness. If you are not saved, get saved. Find a good church and speak to the pastor about your situation. A godly pastor is there to help you. He does not charge a fee to see you. He is God’s servant and will give you wise counsel. You can know that because he will show you what is right from God’s Word.
Be careful not to make a mess of your life because of your pride. Submit to God’s will and be blessed.
Pastor Bartel